Gentle Reader,
I most humbly apologise for my Temerity in daring to address you, but I felt it incumbent upon me to do so. I make this step, not from any Worldly Motives of desiring to win favour or fame for myself, indeed I deplore such motivations in any of those who seek to follow in the Poet's footsteps, for if Homer, the Father of Poetry, ended his days in Poverty and Destitution, who is a mere sketcher of diverting scenes to dream of better?
No, I interrupt the sacred contract between writer and reader to address my audience directly for one reason & one reason only, & that is to warn my readers to exercise Great Discretion in the reading of this poor publication. I fear that there is that in my work which, though written through no motivation to shock or injure, & only seeking to Entertain & Inform through the Veracity of my writing, may be construed by people of Suspicious Minds as 'Unseemly' or even 'Salacious.' That this is not the author's intention is, I hope, Apparent. And yet it is true that there are many characters whom even their mothers must admit to be 'Low' & that some scenes take place which must surely shock those Uniniated in the Vulgarities of London life. I merely beg that the readers accept these matters as a Necessary Evil. In order to illustrate the Noble Aspirations of my heroes, it is necessary to mention also the Base Designs which they must overcome. Furthermore, these evils are taken ENTIRELY FROM LIFE & as such must be admitted to serve an Educational Purpose, if nothing else. Indeed ALL of the events of which I treat with what poor skill heaven has granted its meek servant, are purest TRUTH, excepting of course the parts that the author has been forced to ammend slightly for Ease of Narration, or that she guessed when facts were Unavailable, or that are entirely LIES, for which the author begs the Understanding of her audience, owing to the fact that the narrator is well known to be a Habitual Liar & indeed, has proven to be Quite Unreliable in sundry matters unrelated to the matter at hand. In Which Endaevour, I urge you to consider me
Yr most humble & devoted servant,
Miss V. Lemon.
I most humbly apologise for my Temerity in daring to address you, but I felt it incumbent upon me to do so. I make this step, not from any Worldly Motives of desiring to win favour or fame for myself, indeed I deplore such motivations in any of those who seek to follow in the Poet's footsteps, for if Homer, the Father of Poetry, ended his days in Poverty and Destitution, who is a mere sketcher of diverting scenes to dream of better?
No, I interrupt the sacred contract between writer and reader to address my audience directly for one reason & one reason only, & that is to warn my readers to exercise Great Discretion in the reading of this poor publication. I fear that there is that in my work which, though written through no motivation to shock or injure, & only seeking to Entertain & Inform through the Veracity of my writing, may be construed by people of Suspicious Minds as 'Unseemly' or even 'Salacious.' That this is not the author's intention is, I hope, Apparent. And yet it is true that there are many characters whom even their mothers must admit to be 'Low' & that some scenes take place which must surely shock those Uniniated in the Vulgarities of London life. I merely beg that the readers accept these matters as a Necessary Evil. In order to illustrate the Noble Aspirations of my heroes, it is necessary to mention also the Base Designs which they must overcome. Furthermore, these evils are taken ENTIRELY FROM LIFE & as such must be admitted to serve an Educational Purpose, if nothing else. Indeed ALL of the events of which I treat with what poor skill heaven has granted its meek servant, are purest TRUTH, excepting of course the parts that the author has been forced to ammend slightly for Ease of Narration, or that she guessed when facts were Unavailable, or that are entirely LIES, for which the author begs the Understanding of her audience, owing to the fact that the narrator is well known to be a Habitual Liar & indeed, has proven to be Quite Unreliable in sundry matters unrelated to the matter at hand. In Which Endaevour, I urge you to consider me
Yr most humble & devoted servant,
Miss V. Lemon.
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